What We Want You To Know

A couple weeks ago, we did a little project on a Wednesday night. In case you didn't know, this summer there is a worship service in the youth room open to everyone from 7th grade to Hilltoppers. One of the reasons we've done this is because I believe very firmly that in order for a church to really be what the Church is supposed to be, it has to be open to all generations and those generations should help each other in the pursuit of bringing about God's kingdom on Earth. One of the challenges to this in the modern age is that each generation is sectioned off in their own little worlds, and there is less and less interaction among those worlds.

I feel that as a church we do a disservice to the young people in our fellowship if we don't make an honest effort to get to know them and understand them. After all, we will never really be able to help them navigate through their world if we don't understand it. In the same way, I think we do the church as a whole as a disservice if we don't involve the younger generations and put their passions and abilities to work.

The project was designed to help bridge the gap between the generations. I asked anyone who was out of high school to write themselves a letter of stuff they wish they had known when they were in high school or middle school. I asked the students to write down things they wished that the older generation knew about them. At the end of the hour, I read several of them out loud and I promised I would post some of them online later. So here I am making good on my promise:

First - letters to a younger self:

- You need to know that no matter how big your problems feel, it could be worse - and for a lot of people, it is much worse. At the same time, don't refuse to let yourself feel your feelings. Acknowledge how situations and words make you feel and examine why you reacted the way you did... you'll learn a lot about yourself

- Even though you heard it a million times, I would plead with you to not care what anybody thinks about you. You have untold potential, learn to be disciplined. THINK about what's important and don't waste time on the things that you know don't matter. Enjoy the time you have with your family. They truly are the greatest blessing you've been given. Be more concerned with others than with yourself and you'll find happiness. Don't be scared to be different, but stand out for the right reasons, not just for the attention. In every situation, find the person who needs help the most, and HELP THEM! Take chances - if you fail, you'll recover, and God will love you no matter what.

- Every decision has consequences, think things through. You still have a lot of growing to do. you are not as prepared for the world as you think you are. I know you think you are mature and ready for life, but you have so much left to learn. Look at all those people who have had a great impact on your life and appreciate what they've done. Don't hero-worship others- they are flawed too and you end up throwing others in the gutter. Be brave. Don't be afraid to stand up for who and what is important to you. A lot of change is coming. Hold onto the important things.

- Value those around you. Love is everything - do you even know how to love? Your relationship with God should affect your whole life and be a constant thing - talk to Him constantly. He can be the best friend you've always wanted. You can love yourself and allow others in - God will use relationships to shape you into Him. Always be thankful because entitlement is the opposite of love.

- Don't let people in your life make feel less than you are. Listen to ALL advice given, even if you think its not important because eventually, you may need to use it with or without realizing it. There is ALWAYS someone who understands, loves, cares and will be there for you. It's okay to be upset with God from time to time because for me, those were the times I really saw myself and understood God's part in my life... my best friend and so much more. God loves you and understands more than anyone, So he understands your upset feelings. He gives you opportunities to let yourself go.

- Dig deep into the world, learn from other cultures. Refuse to indulge all your desires - from food to time spent in lazy selfishness. Appreciate your father. Though an alcoholic, he had so much to offer - don't ignore it because of one fault. Soften your hear to God's purposes and lose yourself in what he wants rather than in what you want. Be vulnerable and trust, even if it means you might be hurt. Spend more time in the Word, in nature and in one on one conversation with the King. Serve others more. There is no greater joy than giving of yourself to others. Understand that God's bizarre economy means "the more you give, the greater your gifts."

- (from someone not raised in church and baptized at 24) Go to church, get involved and receive all the benefits that come from having a spiritual family. Participate in youth group activities, especially service projects.

- Do better in school and work hard in sports. Keep your Christian friends closer and stay away from parties. Listen to your parents with they give you advice.

- Don't do stupid stuff. Remember that following Christ is joyful, not burdensome. Praise God in everything you do. Don't sell people short, especially yourself. You're a child of God - act like it and take confidence in it. Live like Christ because that life truly is fuller than any other type of life. Love mercy and remain with those you find to give it to. Realize that having heart and faith are the best attributes. Pursue God with reckless abandon. You only have one life and to spend it pursuing anything else just wouldn't be enough. Remember there is an epistemic distance between you and God. Respect that and know that you don't, and will never, know everything.

- Don't expect life to go the way you planned it. Take the advice of people you love to heart. Realize that there are people who really suffer in this world. You are lucky and loved. Forgive. Stop spending all your money and save! Go easy on yourself. You will make mistakes, but never stop trying to be the best version of yourself. You can decide to be happy in spite of everything that goes on around you. Take care of yourself. You can't help others if you aren't okay. Never give someone else the control to determine how you feel about yourself. Eat, even if you think you are fat. Listen to your parents, even when you think what they say is unfair. They will have your back when the world turns against you. It might seem like God has deserted you, but he hasn't. Call on him when you feel all alone.

- Though you may plan your life one way, don't expect that it's going to turn out that way. Don't stop going to church when you go to college. Choose your friends wisely. They will shape you in ways you don't realize. Don't worry about what other people think about you, because it won't matter in the long run. Be yourself and always show who you really are. When you have the opportunity to share your faith, always do it, because when you look back, you will wish you had. I know it sounds completely outrageous, but sometimes... you're parents are right. Enjoy being young! In fact, cherish it, you're only young once, so live it up!

- You really need to learn proper study habits!!! Yes, not studying was ok in high school and you may graduate with honors but its not the same in college! Oh yeah, don't worry about that distant relative, she is cooler than you think:). Don't be too hard on yourself when you leave home and choose your paths wisely for they may change your whole life for better or for worse. Try not to be too tough. Be a little sensitive and share your feelings every once in a while. It's good to be the strong one, but not all the time. Realize that just because you don't agree with something someone does, it doesn't mean it's wrong. People come and go out of your life... constantly, even people you love and care for deeply!! They leave for numerous reasons. Pray for them!

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And next, what the kids wanted you to know:

- I don't know if other generations know this or not, but one of the norms for a lot of teens (depending on their "group") is to be sexually promiscuous.

- I wish people knew when I was mad or sad so they could be there to comfort me.

- I want someone to know how much I love God and how much I care for him. See me differently and know that I do take church and youth trips and everything else seriously. People judge me for not really following God, but people just don't see the other side of me. They only see me when I'm down or mad or tired and they don't see what I'm going through. Stop judging me for who I am on the outside and judge me on my inside.

- One thing I hate that adults do is judge teenagers. They act like teenagers look for excuses to do something wrong when I know I don't. And then when we're going through something they say "we were teens, too." and step in and say "we went through the same thing". Maybe they did, but it really is a little different for us.

-- Most of the teens wrote that they didn't want me to post their letters online, so out of respect for that, I won't. But I will say that almost all of them had the same basic tenor as the last two posted. They all said in some form or fashion - don't group me in with all teenagers. They wanted to be know as unique individuals. They wanted the adults to know that they really do care about their faith, even if they make a lot of mistakes.

So now the questions: If you are an adult - what have you done to really reach out to the younger generation? How have you actively gotten to know your younger brothers and sisters? If you are a teen - what have you done to learn from someone older than you? How teachable are you? Who that is older do you trust to open up to?