Recently, I had a conversation with a group of friends about "vision" in youth ministry and what that means. I think it is an all too-important question to ask when involved in any kind of ministry. It is far too easy in any kind of ministry, but I think especially youth ministry, to get caught up in the day to day incidentals that come with the job. There's enough to keep you busy without having to sit back and wonder, "What am I really trying to do?"
However, I think it is vital that everyone involved in the youth ministry - from the youth minister, to the volunteers, to the parents, and especially the kids have the purpose and vision of ministry in mind. Otherwise, it tends to be a place where kids just show up - and when kids just show up not knowing what to expect, everybody forms their own expectations. One girl may show up expecting everyone to be nice to her, and when someone isn't nice to her, she writes the church off as a waste of time. One guy may show up with the notion that as long as he's there, he gets credit as a good person. When someone calls him out because his behavior doesn't match what's being taught - he feels wronged or slighted because no one acknowledged his effort to show up. A parent may expect that their child will be given a program that excites the child's desire to participate. When the child expresses apathy or ambivalence for certain aspects of the ministry - the parent may feel like the youth ministry has failed them.
To be sure, none of those expectations are exactly wrong - in fact, I should hope that a youth ministry is a place of safety where kids have people act kindly toward them, a place where people do acknowledge the efforts to do right instead of just focusing on the wrong, and is a place where kids actually like to be. But.... none of those should be the end all desire of the youth ministry. Those are products of being focused on the true vision for youth ministry and the church.
Youth ministry begins and ends with one thing - the loving desire to bring a community's youth into relationship with Christ. If we aren't doing that, then I believe that we are, to borrow language from Paul, nothing more than a clanging symbol. It's a sobering reality for someone like me who has spent all of my adult life dedicated to youth ministry that if I fail at that one thing, then I have failed in ministry. Everything that we do in this ministry, whether its Winterfest, Cell Groups, Bible Study, or just hanging out, must come back to the central question of "are we leading kids to know and love Jesus Christ." That's my vision, that's my passion.
I promised that on these philosophical blogs, I would include a part about how you as parents can help - so here's just a few I can think of:
1 - Hold me accountable. Parents, if you think that our ministry is not challenging the teens enough to go deep with their commitment to Christ, then please (gently please:)) let me know. I try to be very open to constructive criticism.
2 - When conflict arises among the kids (oh, and it will arise), challenge your child(ren) to pursue the most Christ-like path to reconciliation. It usually is not met with great enthusiasm by the students, but from my experience, nothing teaches better than teens seeing the power of forgiveness and humility in the midst of a conflict.
3 - Talk about spiritual matters frequently with your teens. It doesn't always have to be a formal "family devotional". Instead, I like the parenting advice given in Deuteronomy 11:18-20
18 Fix these words of mine in your hearts and minds; tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. 19 Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 20 Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.
Whenever you get the opportunity, let your kids know how scripture and your dedication to living by the Spirit has informed your way of life. Also, be open with things in your past that you regret and why you don't want to see them make the same mistakes.
4 - Have the same vision for your family. Don't see your family as just a group of people living under the same roof who happen to be related. Have a desire to see your family be an active force for the Kingdom of Heaven. Look for ways to do things as a family that serves others, both in the church and in the community.
5 - Get involved in the ministry - not just for your kids, but for the others as well. If you are reading this blog, I can pretty safely assume that you are involved in your child's spiritual develeopment. I thank God for parents like you. Understand that there are kids who come across our youth ministry who do not have adults in their lives that care about spiritual matters. Sometimes, we even come across kids whose parents seem downright opposed to their child's involvement in Christianity. These kids need mentors and role models to look up to across all generational lines.
Those are just a few. If you've got suggestions for the other parents that you think would be helpful, feel free to leave them in the comments.
Thanks again for the job you do as a parent, God bless.
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